I do not watch or go to awards shows ever really, the only ones i ever attend you have never heard of, the Pollstar Live! Awards which is for the concert industry. The Grammys are specifically for recorded music, a part of the industry I don’t work in, but i that i frequently get to enjoy endless last-minute (think thursday or friday) requests for party access or all access passes to the actual events by people one can’t say no to even though i have no secret music code that makes any of this easy or even possible. And i often have to do research involving a minimum of 5 different calls to find out what party it is, who organizes who we have already, blah blah blah, while my own boss-man is busy and still expects things 10 minutes after he first mentions them. Sigh. So come Grammy Weekend I do not go to the awards or any of the parties I get the multitude of VIPS into myself. I don’t even leave my home. Occasionally asking “what in God’s names did i ever do to you, NARAS?!,” I hide under my bed with all the lights in my house out from the moment i get home Friday night until i leave for work Monday morning. It’s the safest option, i swear.

This year I decided GRAMMYFHELL was Bono’s fault:
From: Ses         To: Assistant2
Sent: Thursday, February 24, 2011 12:52 PM
Subject:
RE: GRAMMYF
HELL

“I’d like to give a message to the young people of America, and that is, we shall continue to abuse our position and f*** up the mainstream.” -from Bono’s 1994 Grammy acceptance speech for Best Alt Album of the year.

I remember that damn quote. I was like jumping up & down & cheering & hoping my mom was listening cuz me n Bono were gonna kill it (i was 11/12). It didn’t make me laugh then like it does now. Didn’t know you had to sell out completely to f*** up the mainstream but sure, OK Bono, if you say so.  (Q: so, #BLAMEITONBONO ?)

From: Assistant2                   To: Ses
Sent: Thursday, February 24, 2011 12:54 PM
Subject:
RE: GRAMMYF***HELL

He’s ridic, yeah…
“Whoa there. Easy, Bono” (#BLAMEITONBONO -Def!)

From: Ses         To: Assistant2
Sent: Thursday, February 24, 2011 12:57 PM
Subject:
RE: GRAMMYF***HELL

OK then, DONE. I’m making up the “I BLAME BONO™ & BLAME IT ON BONO™” tees this week.

PS I feel like Radiohead went all U2 way too soon with this new album too. OK Computer /Kid A /Pablo Honey /In Rainbows it’s not, by any stretch =#IBLAMEBONO big time.

Right?!