After 6 years off the market I recently ended what is probably best described as a make-believe engagement with someone who was once my first love, and found myself stoked to be out and about in the dating scene once more. Or so I thought. I always felt like I never got enough time in the carefree, no-pressure, no reasonable expectations dating interludes between my previous relationships. It turns out that in my absence ‘dating’ had been eradicated and replaced by a mish-mash of the worst of both mating worlds: courtship & relationship.
To be fair & in the interest of full disclosure, I am admittedly a bit old-skool in terms of expectations, plus i’m crazy competitive and stubborn, which means i’m uncompromising* of said expectations/standards w/r/t my suitors and dating in general. DO NOT HIDE THE FACT I’M ON A DATE IF YOU WANT ME TO TREAT YOU LIKE MY DATE. Ugh buckets. After each new and exasperating dating foible I found myself firing off text messages to my industry management counterpart CK, who is one of my co-fave new friends from music&hockey: “OMG! Whats the deal with guys & (insert offensive act here)?! If this happens to me 1 more time I might/swear I’ll (humorously dramatic but vague threat here). Please fix the rest of your gender! Gah.”
This obviously has to stop if the friendship is to survive, and I’d prefer that it does since i already gave him the title of boy-bestie about 1.5 years ago. See, CK is that rare person that doesn’t judge me and whose opinion (musical, puckish & maybe even in general) i give an eff about. On top of all this, he’s inexplicably tolerant and patient w/ me & all my random glory, even replying gamely to email missives clearly created solely** for my own work-grind entertainment. Since xy’s are not especially crazy for xx nonsense when they have no interest in scoring (which he doesn’t, thankfully) and since I still suspect his graciousness is partially compulsory due to shared clients and our bosses being besties (a word I taught them both), I decided to mitigate the excess of after-hours non-work-related random bothers I fire his way.
It occurred to me that I could educate the male gender en mass & vent to a worldwide audience on my own, via the web. My ex, Voldemort (yes, THAT Voldemort), provided a plethora of material to help me explain etiquette for both relationship & breakup to the baffled men of earth. Maybe I could actually solve the problem of the sexes! Moreover, I have the most uber awesome music in my pockets as well as 5c psychiatric help and 25c insights galore, all of which NEEDS to be shared, not to mention that I could use the extra change.*** And so: A Blog is Born.
Please play nicely. xxSes
*& why not? I’m so much more than worth it, duh.
**as evidenced by the fact I often forgot I’d sent the message until getting the reply, always bemused by my brilliant nonsense but also shocked I’d actually sent to an audience, particularly one that knows me only superficially, let alone that they replied.
***actual donation link coming soon™. All donations will be used for anonymous good deeds, but expect a massive chunk to help Free Tibet.